Sticking it to the Man Who’s Sticking it to the Man

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That’s the first paragraph in my new story, “Sticking it to the Man Who’s Sticking it to the Man”

Let me explain.

Crystal and I were watching an episode of “Monk” that we had on DVR from a couple of weeks ago and Adrian Monk was taking up painting as a hobby. He was taking a class and the teacher walked by him and asked “Who told you that you can draw?” She went on to tell him that his art wasn’t good. When he said that he was drawing what he saw she said “you aren’t seeing it right.” When he said, “But I thought you said there was no right and wrong,” she responded “never say that again.”

Ok, so it made for funny TV. And what was funnier still is that what he had drawn probably COULD have been taken for “real art”. Heck, Crystal liked it!

But it made me think…why do painters get such liberty when it comes to art. Heck…musicians and sculpters get the same freedom. But writers…they’re much more limited to this same freedom of which I am speaking…

Do a Google search on ‘art splatter’ and you’ll see what I’m talking about. An “artist” can, in the name of art and in rebellion against civilization, splatter paint on a canvas randomly and it gets called “art”. People pay money for this “statement.” You can find sculptures made from junk and there are certain types of music which really seem to have no real form at all. Yet when writers write, they must use WORDS.

If a writer, in a sudden urge to rebel against everything that they were taught…just decided to randomly pound on a keyboard in the name of art, no publisher would pick it up (at least that’s the assumption I’m making now). Though, I wouldn’t doubt it if someone somewhere decided to prove me wrong and got rich and famous because they decided that when it comes to words, there really is no right or wrong, as long as you can see it. It would bring a whole new meaning to the phrase “tell the story in your own words.” Better yet, it won’t be a writer. It’ll be a painter who makes a random congregation of typed text on a canvas and it’ll go down in history.

Well…in case that happens…remember that you saw it here first!

Something I hadn’t seen before

So I was driving to work the other day, probably listening to a book-on-phone (what?). I learned that listening to books while I drive (especially long distances) can really shorten a drive. So my wife bought me some books on CD and I ripped ‘em to my computer, made MP3s out of them and put them on my memory card I bought for my phone which doubles as an MP3 player.

Anyway, so I’m driving along, minding my own business when this vehicle passes me in the next lane over. I had to do a double take…was I really seeing what I thought I was seeing? Perhaps I was drunk…no, I hadn’t had anything to drink in months, much less that morning. Perhaps I was high? No…don’t do drugs. Then why, in the name of everything good and pure, was I seeing what I was seeing? I got it! The end times…they were starting to happen right in front of my face! The world was getting ready to plummet into tribulation and dispair and it was all happening right before my eyes!

Ok…a bit over the top? Perhaps…but so was this:

No – really…it’s a pink Jeep. (I covered the license plate to protect the not-so-innocent)

A.Pink.Jeep.

Why? It’s….why???? Jeeps don’t belong it that color!!! Made for greens…acceptable in reds, blacks, blues, whites….but PINK??? It would be like seeing a rainbow in the sky with BLACK in it. It’s just not natural. You know, I would be willing to bet that as THEY were trying to put that color on the Jeep, it actually tried to dodge the paint. I’ll bet that it tried to shake off the offending tones like a dog shakes off water after a bath. I’ll bet there were mechanical sounds of an engine weeping oily tears as they touched up the last of the paint job. I’ll bet to this day there is a persistant oil leak in from the vehicle and they just don’t understand that THE JEEP IS STILL CRYING!

Get off my planet you barbarians! You don’t give a dog a mink coat and you don’t paint a Jeep PINK!

Ok…again…over the top…but so was the Jeep. Perhaps a inverted view of the colors would help.

There. I’ve made my peace with it.